Whose name is it anyway?

After a divorce, if the woman remarries, whose last name should the child have – the biological father’s or the foster father’s?

Divorce is a social reality that couples - and their children - are increasingly having to deal with. One of the tricky questions that families dealing with divorce have to face is whether a mother, after the separation, can change the name of her kids after remarrying. A few months ago, a Mumbai doctor appealed for permission in the Bombay High Court to let her twin daughters take her new husband’s name, which is being opposed by her ex-husband and the biological father of the children; this, despite the fact that custody was granted to the mother after divorce.

The legal view
Sunil Mittal, vice chairman of the Delhi Bar Council, says, “Although there is no codified law, irrespective of the status of the marriage, the children take on the father’s second name. The biological father has the right to obtain a stay order if their second name is being changed. The only way out I see is that the new couple (biological mother and foster father) legally adopt the children, but that too, has to be done with the consent of the biological father.”

Advocate Mukesh Anand explains, “Once the mother has custody, the kids’ last name is her decision. The law is not very strict about it. But if the father is providing alimony, he may have a say. On moral grounds, he cannot object to the change, or a lot will be taken into consideration, such as the reason for divorce, the father’s influence over the kids, etc. Also, after 18 years of age, the child can keep whatever name he/she wants.”

What the kids say
But what do children who are caught in such cases think about it? Rachna, 22, who lives with her divorced mother, says, “I still add my father’s second name to my name. Although I mulled over dropping the second name, I decided otherwise, since it would’ve been too much of a legal tangle. I don’t know much about law, but it would help if they allowed the mother to have the right to change/drop the child’s second name after the separation.”

Says scriptwriter Shantanu Ray Chibber, “My parents got divorced when I was five. My mom decided not to drop her ex-husband’s surname from my name, but they both agreed that once I grew up, I could make my own choice. Now, at 34, I have also taken my stepfather’s surname, he has done a lot for me in my life and as a token of gratitude, I have taken up this screen name. I’m not very sure about the legality, but I know that my stepdad has legally adopted me and now I am carrying both my dads’ names.”

“It’s been ten years since my divorce, but my son Subhro still carries the last name of my ex-husband,” says advertising professional Rita. “My sons have different surnames now, but it’s up to Subhro to change his name in the future. Even if you do change your children’s last name, you won’t be changing the legally recognised identity of their father. Nor will a name change affect the rights or duties of either parent regarding visitation, child support, or rights of inheritance,” she adds.

Abhi, 27, who’s in the middle of a divorce but has no kids, believes that the mother knows best. “The mother has the right to change the name of the kids after divorce if she is their custodian, because she’s the mother, she obviously knows what’s good and bad for them. On the other hand, if the custody of the kids were with the dad, he’d have a say in their last name.”

Source:http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/